Pain and breath

One morning, as I deeply exhaled,

I felt a profound sadness, suddenly.
Apparently manifested from nowhere,
it was so strong

that I wondered why it didn't seem
like it was pouring out.

At that moment it occurred to me that perhaps

my breathing tends to be as shallow as it often is

as a response
and product
of a powerful machine that can only be known through the things it produces.

I imagine that many of these exhales hold back
a potential torrent,
and that if I allowed them to be emitted,
unabated and with regularity,
that so much might come out
that my insides might end up outside

like they were one continuous membrane.